Note: I’m speaking for myself here, not on behalf of The Gospel Coalition (my employer and a ministry I care deeply about).
I believe wisdom moves necessarily slower than the pace set by social media.
In processing the explosive response to Josh Butler’s March 1 Beautiful Union book excerpt at The Gospel Coalition, I’ve thus been slow to say anything publicly. This has required great restraint! But I’ve lived long enough in the internet age—and worked long enough in the online content industry—to know that defensive hot takes and emotional responses to online storms are usually unhelpful and just add to the noise.
I also know from experience that anything published online (or offline)—no matter how well-intentioned—is fair game for critique. Josh knows this too, and he’s happy to engage in conversations with good faith critics. Pushback and disagreement, however, are different from ridicule and cancellation. The former is welcomed and constructive. The latter is only destructive. And in a “negative world” where the latter, scorched-earth mode dominates, fewer and fewer people will feel comfortable writing anything remotely risky or potentially unpopular. This is a loss for discourse, and ultimately for truth.
Though a good deal of the criticism heaped on Josh’s book excerpt was uninformed and reckless, some of it was nuanced and fair. I’m grieved by the distress Josh’s excerpt caused some who are dealing with the ongoing effects of sexual trauma, and it’s fair to suggest that some sort of trigger warning or more thorough setup with the excerpt would have been wise. That’s a lesson learned. I’m also sympathetic to criticisms surrounding the frank language Josh used in the excerpt article. While I personally don’t think such direct language about sex in reference to theology is inappropriate or novel in Christian tradition (as others have pointed out), it’s fair to suggest that the nature of the internet—so indiscriminate in where words go and how they land—makes the use of this language, in this medium, unwise. That’s a lesson learned too.
My objective in this post is not to respond to all the fair criticisms of Josh’s excerpt or the full book, however. No doubt there are many valid critiques beyond the few I mentioned above—which, again, is normal and necessary for the sake of good conversations about important topics.
My aim in this post is just to share a bit, from my personal vantage point, about why I think Beautiful Union is important and worthy of a wide readership; and why I wholeheartedly stand by my endorsement of it. I read every word of the book (as endorsers of books are wise to do), and I reaffirm my enthusiastic assessment of it:
Beautiful Union is simply astonishing. Every chapter is full of mind-blowing biblical insights, jaw-dropping theological connections, and a profound reframing of the contentious dimensions of sex. It’s the Protestant magnum opus on sexual ethics we’ve been waiting for and one of the most important books I’ve ever read. With pastoral care, theological precision, and worshipful joy, Butler brings refreshing clarity to a culture (and sadly, a church) increasingly confused about the meaning, purpose, and ethics of sex. I rarely use the word masterpiece in describing a contemporary work, but it’s absolutely fitting here.
Josh Butler the Person
Before I talk more about his book, let me say a few words about Josh Butler the person. I have known Josh for about six years. I know him to be profoundly compassionate, pastoral, funny, brilliant, loyal, selfless, and generally Jesus-like. His very demeanor and countenance (including his trademark hair) exudes the joy of the Lord. If “winsome” hadn’t become such a loaded word, I’d say he’s the epitome of a winsome evangelist and apologist.
He’s also intellectually curious and honest, fiercely committed to truth over tribalism and reality over narratives. This means he has comrades (and likely enemies) on all sides of the tribal landscape. It also means he’s not beholden to any “agenda” of a particular stream or partisan vantage point. This is part of what makes him trustworthy. He wants to discover the truth as it emerges from God’s Word, God’s creational design, and godly wisdom through the ages—not as it is refereed by the speech codes du jour on Twitter. This is rare and brave, and it’s what we desperately need. Our commitment to tribalism over truth (saying only what’s OK with the party line, or safe enough to not ruffle feathers) is killing us.
At a time when Gen Z is right to be suspicious about church leaders whose convictions conveniently contort when it serves in-group purposes (particularly political power), Josh is exactly the sort of kingdom (not party) loyalist we can take seriously. He’s the type of intellectually curious pastor-theologian we need to encourage, not destroy.
He cut his teeth in ministry in Portland, Oregon—and made a real impact in one of the most post-Christian cities in the world. He has a true pastor’s heart for the lost, which is what drives his brave attempts to go there on the hardest topics of the day. He did this in his apologetics book on hell and divine wrath (The Skeletons in God’s Closet) nine years ago, and he’s doing it again in his superb new book on sexual ethics, Beautiful Union.
Beautiful Union the Book
I’ve read many books and articles on biblical sexual ethics, theology of the body, and umpteen Christian works on marriage—from Pope John Paul II to John Piper, John Chrysostom to Abigail Favale; from Catholic and Orthodox and Protestant perspectives, from the first century to the twenty-first. The substance of what Josh is saying here is not new in Christian tradition (especially to Catholic and Orthodox ears). But he is doing a valuable service in synthesizing tradition and contextualizing it for post-Christian ears, and in a modern vernacular (which, yes, might sound crass or inappropriate to some ears).
Whatever you thought about the book excerpt that ignited so much controversy in March, may I submit that the intellectually charitable move for skeptics and critics, from here, is to read the book in its entirety now that it’s available, and assess Josh’s argument on the merits of the whole, not a very small part. Even if some parts of Josh’s argument could have been better stated, or more elegantly argued, I found Beautiful Union to be riveting, wise, worshipful (it made me love God more), compassionate (it made me love my neighbor more), and convicting (it made me want to pursue holiness).
Josh’s project is doubtless risky. He’s trying to speak openly and clearly about a topic that makes us uncomfortable. He’s trying to reframe sex as beautiful and meaningful, in a culture where it has long been perverted and profaned. Contrary to narratives which took off on Twitter, the reality of Beautiful Union is that Josh pulls no punches in decrying these perversions and abuses (sexual violence, misogyny, etc.) and advocating for their victims. His book rigorously and compassionately unpacks why sexual sin is always egregious. Whether rape, abuse, porn, adultery, pre-marital sex, prostitution, masturbation, same-sex sexual activity, or any other form of sexual sin, what’s happening is a defacing of the icon of sex—like taking spray paint to the Mona Lisa. It corrupts the character of a beautiful thing. Josh advocates for all those who have been burned by the destructive defacing of sex. I agree with a fellow endorser who notes that Josh’s attitude in the book is “sensitive and pastoral to wounded readers.”
Still, the pervasive pain around sex in our culture—and in our own lives—is why the discussion is unavoidably triggering. Because sex has been defaced for so long, and in so many ways, our eyes strain to see it as anything remotely sacramental or iconic (pointing beyond itself to the beauty and holiness of God). Perhaps the most discouraging thing of all in this episode is that it reveals just how far we have to go in this work—like archaeologists who have to excavate layers and layers of muck and dirt, with all manner of cleaning brushes and refurbishment tools, before anything remotely beautiful can be seen in the original artifact.
In this pornographic age of immense sexual brokenness and confusion, Josh’s work in Beautiful Union, however imperfect, can help readers see sex in the way God intended it to be seen—as a window into his glorious, sacrificial, self-giving love for us.
Bigger Battle
I get that frank theological talk of sex triggers us. Sex is a potent thing that, when sinfully distorted, cuts us in ways that leave deep, lasting wounds. But remember: sex is a thing God made! There’s an inherent goodness to it we mustn't downplay just because it can go bad in so many ways. God is not ashamed of his design for sex, and he doesn’t want his people to be. He made the sexual union in just the way that he did, for a reason.
As such, we Christians can’t just shrug and say, “this thing is too gross to talk about” or “it’s too painful or distorted for its creational meaning to be salvaged.” Neither can we say, “the Bible’s way of talking about sex is too foreign and dangerous in contemporary culture. Let’s just avoid it.”
We have the Bible’s way of talking about sex, or we have no way of talking about sex. Will standing by God’s Word on these matters be easy and popular? No. Will the work of Josh and others—to communicate God’s perspective on sex in a way that cuts through the immense confusion and baggage—be messy and imperfect? Yes.
But as hard as it is, this work is not something Christians can just respectfully opt out of. Sex is an important battleground right now in Satan’s assault on God’s Word and the church. If he can sow confusion and doubt about the Bible because of what it says about sex, he’s won. If he can tempt Christians into sexual sin in their own lives, thus rendering the church a group of hypocrites, he’s won. If he can turn every internal disagreement in the church into cause for tribalistic division, reaping disunity among biblically faithful Christians on a topic where co-belligerency is needed, he’s won.
On this treacherous battleground of sexual ethics and meaning, Satan is arguably winning. The last thing we should do now, however, is give up the fight. The meaning of what God made in the sexual union of a husband and wife is too beautiful and important to abandon as a subject of inquiry. Rather, we must lean into this topic and have this conversation, for God’s glory and our flourishing.